Thursday, January 5, 2012

What I Don't Want

What I don't want is for you to read my blog and think that I am mad at you.  I have so many people in my life, that when I write, I write about things that have happened many, many times, and things that have been done by many, many people.  What I don't want is for you to think I am singling you out, calling you out, for doing something to upset me.  Katie, our family, and I have been dealing with Autism for over 10 years now.  Nothing you say or do hasn't probably been already said or done before. 

What I do want is for you to enjoy reading about how Autism has impacted our lives, and the lives of those around us.  I want you to learn more about what goes on in "everyday Autism" because when you see us, we are usually on our best behavior, so you might come to the conclusion that Autism is easier than we make it out to be.  If Katie acted all the time like she acts when she is out in public, this would be a piece of cake.  In some ways it is fortunate that she saves the worst for home.  That means less embarrassment and less frustration.  That also means that others accept her more willingly.  On the flip side, I think it also gives people the impression that Katie is a calm, sweet, happy child all the time.  Don't get me wrong, Katie is a wonderful girl.  I don't want to make her out to be a monster at all, that is far from the truth.  And I am very aware of the fact that she is very well behaved for a child on the Autism Spectrum comparatively. 

What I don't want is for you to think I am complaining about Katie in any way.  I love Katie so much that it makes me cry.  I don't want you to think I am looking for pity, or that I am feeling sorry for myself.  God gave me Katie the way she is, and although life has been a struggle at times, it is the life God intended for me to share with my family, and I wouldn't trade it for anything.  I was hesitant to begin this blog, and I have found myself hesitating before writing certain things.   If you read my words and believe that I am writing them to share my experiences, not to be mean or to create sympathy, then I will have accomplished something worthwhile.

What I do want is for you to laugh out loud, you can even shed a tear or two.  I want you to read about our crazy times, our hard times.  If you have Autism in your life, I hope that you can relate to me on a certain level, so that we can know that we are not alone as parents, or siblings, or teachers, or grandparents, or friends of Autism.  I want to reach people who do not have Autism in their lives, or want to learn more about it.  I want to teach people who don't understand Autism what it means on a day to day basis.  I also want to gently remind those who think that sometimes Autism is a game that can be played, remind them that they may be hurting more than they are helping.  That although they think something might be funny, they may be making it very, very hard on people who have to live and breathe the consequences later on.

What I don't want is for people to stop being as gracious as they have always been towards Katie, and all children impacted by this condition.  What I do want is for you to continue reading what I have to share about my Adventures in Autism, and that you remember Autism isn't always what it appears to be.

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